


If you ever leave me can I come with you.

by Jammiebear00



Category: Phan, dan and phil
Genre: DAN AND PHIL - Freeform, Dan Howell and Phil Lester - Freeform, Other, Phan - Freeform, Phandom - Freeform, Phanfiction
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-07-07
Updated: 2016-07-07
Packaged: 2018-07-22 01:06:15
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,109
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7412464
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Jammiebear00/pseuds/Jammiebear00
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Short Phan Story, no summary necessary.</p>
            </blockquote>





	If you ever leave me can I come with you.

Phils POV  
"What the hell?" I shouted as I walked into the flat to find Dan passed out on the couch 10 open beer bottles surrounding him on the floor and another 6 pack waiting to opened.   
"Huh what?, oh hey welcome back" he slurred his words as he staggered over to me.   
"I was only gone for 2 days, you even stand two days without me that you had to resort to this?"  
"I misseded you" He wrapped his long arms around me and tried to kiss me his breath smelled strongly of alcohol which made me gag. so i pushed him away causing him to stagger backward falling on his butt.   
"Hey, why you do that? I just want some loving."  
'Not when you're drunk" I picked up my bag and walked into my bedroom not the one we shared but the one that posed as my room for the videos. I set the bags down and sighed. this was getting to be a bad habit or maybe it had turned into an addiction. I walked back out he was still on the floor curled up in a fetal position.   
"Get up and get to bed"   
"No" he pouted like a child who didn't get his way. 'Im sleeping right here till your done being mean."  
"Bear please get into bed you need to sleep this off."  
"Nope nope nope"   
Grabbing under his arms i lifted him up and helped him to bed. "I think you have a problem" I whispered after I knew he was passed out again. I turned off the light and went back to my room.   
I couldn't sleep I checked up on Dan hourly to make sure he didn't choke on his own vomit. by the time the sun came up I was exhausted and fell asleep.   
"Phil" Dan spoke softly as he tapped on the door "My head is pounding"  
"Well you should have thought about that before you got drunk again' I snapped   
"Are you mad at me?, look I was just trying to cope"  
I turned over in my bed to face him he looked horrible, his hair was a mess and had dark circles under his eyes, for a split second I actually felt bad for him. "cope with what? you have been trying to cope too much and I'm getting tired of dragging your pathetic ass to bed. I got up to face him I needed to get it out  
"Phil please don't yell at me."   
"No you promised me you would stop, and you did then I went away for 2 lousy days and you couldn't stand it so you started up again, I'm tired of it, Dan! you need to get over your dependency on me! I'm sick of cleaning up your vomit and your sad excuses, I'm done!" I could feel my face getting red as the anger built up inside me.  
"OK no more, this time for realz"  
"You said that last time"  
"What the fuck do want from me, Phil?" He shouted back   
I spoke softer as I looked down at the carpet 'I need space Dan"  
He didn't speak he just bit his lip and nodded fighting back tears.   
"I..." I started to say but he cut me off   
'Your breaking up with me?"  
The tears now streaming down both of our faces.   
"Not a break up just time apart for a while.. you need to show me I can leave for a day or two without you drinking, and that you can straighten yourself up"  
"Please don't leave me again"   
"I'm sorry Dan" As I turned to walk away I felt his hand wrap around my arm and squeeze like a snake.   
"No, you're not leaving again!" He shouted again   
"You're hurting me' I squirmed to try to break his grip but his hand got tighter I could feel my arm start to bruise   
All at once he let go looking scared and I dropped to the floor. I picked myself up and grabbed my bag from my room. "It's over" I stated as I slammed the front door behind me

Dan's Pov  
I dropped his arm and let him fall I had no idea what came over me I was never physical with him, But I was so pissed, why did he have to keep leaving when he knew that his departure was what sent me into this depression. and this time.. it may be for good. "I'm sorry i repeated over and over. I felt the panic rising in my voice as he dragged his bag to the door. his words "It's over" was like a knife stabbing me in the chest. I threw open the door and chased him but he must have already hopped a cab. i grabbed a bottle off the floor and throw it at the wall it burst sending the beer and glass shards flying in all directions. My head felt like it was ready to burst like the bottle as I dropped to the floor and cried.   
Phils POV  
I had no idea where I was going thankfully there was a taxi nearby. "Where to?" He spoke in an Irish accent.  
"Riverview motel" I mumbled as I rummaged through my bag hoping I still had money on me when I saw that I did and a good bit at that I sat back in the seat and rolled up my sleeve to see the bruise. I winced at the pain.   
the cabbie looked back in the rearview mirror but didn't ask questions.   
I checked my phone no new messages or voicemails. I thought a few times of having him turn around and go back, I was worried about dan, scared he might do something stupid but instead i checked my phone to see if Dan would write.   
after I checked into the hotel I checked my phone once more after seeing that nothing had changed in the last 4 minutes I lay in my bed and sobbed. It felt as if every tear I had held back in the past 6 months since this all started was now flowing freely onto the tacky flowered comforter. I must have fallen asleep because when I opened my eyes again and looked out the window it was dark. I looked at my phone again. 1 new message from Dan.  
"I'm sorry please come back. It will all be different"  
I threw my phone on the bed like it was poison and the words would make me feel something, but those words "I'm sorry" were just that, words empty meaningless words that always made me come back before. But not this time, he crossed the line when he put his hands on me.   
I looked at twitter but he didn't post anything, usually when I went away anywhere he tweets about how bored and lonely he is. But there was nothing this time.   
Dan's POV   
Two things I knew for sure.  
1 That he was gone for real this time   
and   
2 that it was all my fault.   
I looked at the clock on my phone 12:33 am  
I cracked open a beer and started drinking, it burned going down my throat and had a bitter taste. I thought about dumping it down the drain but I kept drinking I just wanted to drink until I was numb then I would stop.   
Phils POV:   
Another message arrived at 2:02 Am   
Dan: callll meeee..  
I knew from the way it was written that he had been drinking, there was always a big difference between sober and drunk texts.   
my thumb hovered over the call button for a few seconds but I decided against it, he would just pull me back in. I sent him a message instead: It's over, it's been over, I just didn't have the guts to accept it until now. I am moving on I suggest you do the same.   
I pulled up twitter again to see a strange tweet from Dan;  
Who's awake? Come see me on my last younow broadcast.   
"Last" I repeated I created a fake account and logged in.   
"Hi everybody" his speech was slow and slurred   
there was already over 500 in the chat all confused and concerned  
Dan: Annaphanana says are you OK?  
He shook his head and took a drink from a bigger bottle that I recognized as the vodka we were saving for our anniversary. It was almost empty.   
Dan; Let me tell you guys a little bedtime story, about a guy named Dan and guy named Phil, they met on the internet and became bestest friends and hid their secret relationship from alll of their fans,   
He spread out his arms almost falling out of his chair  
They were in love but Dan did something stupid and lost the trust of his best friend and they both lived miserably ever after.   
I quickly typed out a message:   
philsfan says: Dan stop it now you are scaring everyone.  
He took another sip from the bottle emptying it and throwing it aside  
He laughed "am I scaring all of you?"  
the chat filled with yes and what's going on from the people that just logged in  
Well as my tweet said this is my last broadcast, guess you can say I'm retiring.   
I started to panic remembering the gun we got because I was scared of burglars. I needed to get back home. I ran down to the lobby in my slippers I tried to call but his phone was off so I logged on to younow so I could keep an eye on him as I slid into a cab and gave him my address adding go quick.  
Phil if you are watching this and I'm sure you are I really am sorry I love you but I can see that I am nothing but baggage to you. I'm sorry If I've been too clingy but after almost losing my mother I realized that life is too short and at any moment I could lose you too and I started to panic and became you said "Pathetic"   
I quickly typed: "I'm sorry i didn't mean it I was upset but this is not the answer"  
He laughed and pulled out the gun. the chat room filled with protest but at that moment I didn't care about them it was just me and him.   
"Please, baby don't do this. I love you!"   
"Move faster!!! I yelled at the cabbie why the hell was there so much traffic at this hour.   
"Please Danny think about your family" I pleaded , my heart felt like it was attempting to pound right out my chest.   
"Phil.. I''ll show you I can do something right"   
he put the gun in his mouth   
"no!" I yelled as I typed causing the driver to hit the breaks   
keep bloody driving  
the sweat was pouring off of me I needed to distract him until i got home so I could talk him down.   
"Remember the time we went to see avatar" I typed quickly   
he lowered his gun and I could see he was crying.   
"although I don't think we saw any of the movie at that time."   
I didn't even care that was revealing secrets to now thousands of fans all I cared about was getting him change his mind.   
"and all the times we snuggled by the fire drinking cocoa and you played our song on the keyboard'   
Yeah well now all of that is gone isn't it Philly, we lost it all and if you come back to me now it, all you will feel is resentment towards me for running your life  
A block away I threw some money at the driver and ran as fast as I could,   
everyone else in the chat was silent   
"MY sweet bear I will never resent u"   
I wish that was true .   
He lifted the gun again   
"No please hun"   
I was running up the steps at full speed  
your right I shouldn't do this in front of everyone, he walked out of view and just as I got the door to the apartment opened the sound of a single gunshot echoed in the flat and on screen.   
I pushed open the bedroom door screaming   
"DAN NO NO NO, PLEASE NO!!!" I picked up his limp body sobbing uncontrollably. I reached out with my hand covered in blood and logged out of younow and dialed 999. Explaining what happened and told them there would be two bodies at this address. I picked up the gun and put it to my head.   
End


End file.
